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      You will never know if you don`t try

     



Isn't it strange that when you finally meet the one person who is your best friend you aren't satisfied until they are more than a friend? Well, This is what happened to me.


He is so caring, understanding, compassionate. He listens to what I have to say, gives me adviceand never turns his back on me. This is my best friend. I knew from the day I first met him that I cared about him deeply. In the beginning things were developing as friends but at the same time were developing as more than friends. Then as things began to progress more, we lost touch.


Almost a year later I received a phone call from him. He missed me. He wanted to see me again, to be my friend again. So we started to hang out again. Things seemed to be getting back on track. And then one day I made the foolish mistake of going out with one of his friends... so I could get over him.


It was probably the worst relationship I had ever had. After this relationship was over, I spoke with my best friend. I told him that for the past many months (and even when he was gone), I really cared for him deeply as more than a friend. Now I always wonder why guys say the things they do. "I like us as friends - It isn't the right time now - I'm attracted to you and you are attracted to me, but we can't be together." I naturally accepted this as I didn't want my friendship to be ruined over my feelings for him. I figured that a friendship is better than nothing. But inside my heart ached. Why would he say this? What was he really thinking? Did he only say those things so I would feel better? Did he really care about me? Many friends told me to forget about him, to keep him as a friend and to move on. But deep down in my heart I still had those feelings for him. Those feelings that I fear will never go away. It hurts to think of him being with another woman. It hurts to think of me not being with him. I've tried so hard to show him that I really do care... by being the best friend that I can possibly be, by opening my heart to him and showing him my kindness and compassion. But he doesn't seem to see it. He doesn't seem to understand. And my heart continues to break.


One day I know I will get over it but until then I will lie in my bed at night wondering why we can't be together. If you are a guy reading this and there has been a girl in your life that has told you that she cares about you, don't break her heart, instead, open your heart to her. Take a risk, it just might be worth taking in the end. You will never know if you don't try.

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