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      Goodbye my love


Four years ago, I met a person that will impact my life forever.

Aiden and I met in high school. He was the guy every girl wanted to date. He was refined, defined, and entirely likable. Our first date was arranged my some mutual friends. I was so nervous to be going out with him. I was captured in his every move from the very beginning. I knew the night we first kissed that I was going to fall so deeply in love with him. And, needlessly to say, I did and to this day, that is still the case.

We couldn't keep our hands off each other. After four years, the physical part of our relationship still seemed brand new. The remainder of our relationship swayed because my parents forbade me to see him because of our diverse religious backgrounds and the fact that Aiden lacks motivation and goals for his life. I'm the baby of my family and I know that my parents only wanted me to have a good life. But still, I never gave up on my relationship with Aiden because of them. I loved him and that's all that mattered.

After I graduated from high school, I realized very quickly how the real world worked. I took on a full-time job and went to school full-time. I was constantly busy or tired by the days end. Everything changed. I began to be annoyed by the fact that he was so carefree. I was afraid that he would never change and I would be left my whole life to see after him. I loved him though so much. I have always been a helpless romantic but the time came six months ago where I had to decide to choose between my heart and my head. I chose my head. I felt like I couldn't compromise my life by being with someone who wasn't the least bit concerned for their future or mine since I was involved here too.

To this day, I have bitter sweet feelings about Aiden. I still think about him every single day. And, I still dream of him every night. We actually tried to work things through a couple of months back. But, not much had changed. Telling him goodbye was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I still loved him, and always will, but sometimes, it's nice to know that someone loves you enough to provide for you and prepare a future for you too. Or, so that's what I continue to tell myself. I spend a lot of time wondering if I did the right thing. But I just feel like he cut off my options. He and I do not see each other or talk anymore, and I am seeing someone else.

My new boyfriend works a lot, and is very sweet and sincere. And although everything else is right in my present relationship, I don't think I'll ever truly get over my first true love and I certainly will never forget him.

I wish things could have been different.


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