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      One or the other - forbidden love


During my time of sadness, being in the same spot I have been for years, my mystery man came along. I met this dream guy in November of 2002, and we've been seeing each other ever since. Valentine's day was the first time I went out on a real date with him, just me and him without friends. Since then we developed a relationship like no other. We are committed to each other with all our hearts, but the matter of us being different race has caused a real burden on our relationship which has forced us to choose the important things in our life.

He comes from Africa and me from Europe. My parents will never approve and would disown me. They even said that if I were to be with a black man, they would move out of the country and leave everything behind. They say the biggest embarrassment for them would be to walk down the street with a black grandchild. This man is the love of my life and I don't want to imagine myself without his love. I have to carry upon my shoulders the reality of losing my family if I am to choose to be with him for the rest of my life. To continue our relationship, I have lied to my parents claiming that this man is Polish, but that is my only option. I know we will grow old together and there is nothing that we cannot overcome if we work together as a team. To have him and my parents in my life is impossible. It's one or the other. When the time comes that we can survive together and can stand on our own two feet I will choose to be with him. I myself have to be happy too, and this man can grant me that and has granted me that.

The hardest thing will be to lose my family. It's time for me spend the rest of my life with the one person I love so much at the risk of losing everything. But together, we will survive. My parents will not be here forever, but me and him together will be there for each other forever and a day.

If you love someone with all your heart, don't give up that person because others will not be happy. Hold onto that special person, because it's you that has to spend the rest of your life with that person you have chosen not your family or your friends.

Listen to your heart and your head not what others say. You're the one that has to live the life you have chosen. Skin color should never matter. All that matters is that you trust, love, care and understand each other and want the same things in life. Screw what others think, you're the only person that knows what's best for you. Settle for what you think is for you not what others want you to settle for.


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