This is about a man and a woman who met about 3 years ago in church. I walked into this church planning on being put to sleep by some cranky old preacher who was going to sit there for an hour telling me how much better I could live my life. Instead I saw this dark haired man about 40 with a beard and moustache to die for. I never knew church could be so interesting.
There was just one problem with this situation. He was married. And I was married also. Very happily I might add. But when we saw each other the sparks flew. I mean he would get my blood to pumping.
It was about two years into knowing each other when we finally started talking more. Lingering in the halls, phone conversations. etc.. Then one day I got this phone call. It was him. He had ask me what I wanted for my birthday. I thought " is this for real. Is he actually getting interested in me?", My heart melted. I told him I wanted nothing and he said he had written a song for me ! and wanted to sing that to me. I was literally shaking from wanting this man so much. I told him ok and the next day which was February 2nd my birthday I went to church an hour early so I could hear this song. It was a song asking me if I felt for him the way he felt for me and telling me that he had feelings for me. I just melted. I told him yes.
After a couple of days my conscience got the best of me and I told my husband of the feelings this man had for me and told him I had feelings for him to. Crap hit the fan, I quit church, they confronted each other, no fighting just my husband telling him he loved me.
Two weeks went by, I had to see him again. I asked my husband if we could please return to church. And promised him nothing was going on. We went in and asked the pastor if he would allow us to come back. He said yes. As of now you see my other problem is, he is a pastor.
Time went on and the feeling grew deeper and deeper, another year had almost past with us just talking a kiss here and there and us telling each other our feelings, until one day he went to Florida. I missed this man so much that my whole body ached. I longed for him to return. He did and for Christmas we spent our first time together in 3 years. It was wonderful. It was so special. He brought out feelings in me that I never knew existed.
Yes we are both still married. We met like this several more times. The feeling just could not be controlled I knew this was wrong but what do you do when you are falling in love with someone who belongs to someone else.
Needless to say he separated from his wife. Resigned his ministry. and moved to Florida to be with his family. I had the opportunity to go but so far have not been. I have a son who does not want to leave here. I miss this man who has given up everything to be with me. I told him today I would not be coming down to live with him. That I was keeping the family I have. He was hurt and upset. I do love this man and I want to be with him. But I must put my son first.
I just wish he could understand this.
signed, lonely and confused