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      It was too late


On April 23 2002, The phone rang, It was a friend of mine, she muttered the words that shattered my heart, "Amanda, Stefan hung himself last night, he didn't make it."

At the young age of 17, my dear friend of many years took his own life. We all knew he was upset over the break-up of him and his long time girlfriend, but he made it out to be like he was feeling better. 3 months went by and she still wasn't in his life. But what we didn't know is that inside he was secretly dying.

He was the kind of person who would go out of his way to make you feel better, he was someone you looked forward to seeing, his smile could light up a dark room, just being around him made you feel good about yourself, he never showed a minute of sadness or negative energy. Everyone who knew him loved him dearly. I guess he just got to the point where his pain took over and he couldn't deal with anything bad because his heart was full of kindness.

I was in love with him for 2 years and I never got to tell him. Stefan and I were best friends, but he had this girl who he loved and I always sat back and wished it was me, but I never got to tell him how important he was to me, because maybe all he needed was someone there telling him he was special, because on April 23, 2002 he forgot that, and was blinded by despair, but couldn't pull himself out of the darkness, now he leaves behind many friends, family, and people who loved him, my heart breaks everyday knowing I can never see that smile again, my light burned out and I'm left with this pain that I cannot get rid of, He ended his own soft pain and created mine and so many others......... I just miss him dearly, and I wish I could have told him that he was so important.

People die, friendship remains


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