The Notebook is Bullshit....or is it?
I’ve seen the Notebook. It a great, but not at all realistic, story about love conquering all and true love never failing and all of that other fairy tale bullshit. Recently I witnessed something that may have changed my perspective….
Hospice. A scary word. The law says that you can only be admitted into hospice if your doctor feels you have 6 months or less to live. My grandfather was put onto hospice due to dementia. And was on it for over 24 months. My grandfather had done everything for my grandmother, helped raise 6 children, worked hard as an electrician, loved his wonderful grandchildren, great grandchildren, and great great grandchildren. Unfortunately, dementia enveloped him. He still recognized those “who belonged” in his family but couldn’t always tell you your name, or where he was, or who had his damn car! He spent most days sitting in his chair, with my grandmother sewing or putsing, or causing general mayhem with the staff at the independent living they were at.
Then on January 7, 2016, grandma fell. She hit her head while trying to get out of bed. I visited her that evening. She was in acute, excruciating pain but still knew what was going on. She asked me about my recent trip to England and while she grimaced in pain I described to her the sights I had seen, trying to distract her from the pain. She died January 9, just two days later.
My grandfather was quickly moved to one of his grandchildren’s house, to ensure someone was with him 24 hours a day. He announced on Monday, January 11, that he no longer had any reason to live now that grandma was gone. This man, who usually didn’t know who you were or where he was, knew that the love of his life was gone. Grandpa quickly deteriorated and on January 22, passed away.
My grandfather loved my grandmother so much, he couldn’t live two weeks without her. This is not some great work of fiction or a legend from years past. I witnessed it. It’s real. True love that cannot be separated, even in death.