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      K: My Best Friend's Boyfriend

     


In this story there is:

K (the guy)

N (the best friend)

No full names for identity purposes.





Freshman year in '11 was the best year of my life and how many people can say that?



Honestly, in the beginning, I was skeptical. Having had other friends from junior high, I didn't think I would be able to make any friends in high school simply because I was a 13 year old pessimist (and still one to this day) and kind of didn't want any one new people in my life. I hated the idea of change and new people and new surroundings I don't know, I just did. Plus it's kind of still hard for me to make friends due to my awkward tendencies and or mild-shyness.



During my lunch period on the first day, I met N (the best friend) and since my high school has a junior high in it, many people already had "cliques" they were used to. Part of the reason why I didn't think I'd fit in. Anyway, N and I were both socially awkward with each other but ended up finding out that we both liked anime because growing up that's what I watched haha. So, we joked about our childhood days for so long and instantly became close.



N had four other friends already from junior high, but they weren't as close as we became to be. I told her my biggest secret and she told me hers. She even told me once that I was the reason she wasn't depressed anymore. (She had a very rough childhood, rougher than mine, that's all I have to say about that.)



Sophomore year I was pretty much apart of N's clique of friends and they liked me, which I couldn't believe sometimes. The second week came, and no one was really expecting anyone new. I wasn't either.



The first time I saw J, we didn't utter a word to each other at all. It wasn't romantic at first because remember, I'm awkward. So of course when he looked at me, I looked back then looked away.



It wasn't until the fourth time I saw him during our gym class together, I told him that his fly was down in a low voice so no one would hear and he gave me this wide-eyed look, zipped it up in secret, thanked me and smiled. I didn't think of him that much until some days later, when he waved at me. With that same smile.



I guess that's how I began this stupid crush on him. He was cute and he seemed nice. I actually found myself feeling happy for K now that he found good friends like I had. It was harder for him than it was for me.



K, when he first came, seemed cold and heartless. Least thats what everyone thought. So did I at one point. Until I started talking to him. I even invited him to sit with my friends at our lunch table. On a regular he would sit with us and always right next to me. After some time, one of my other friend's joked about him liking me with K sitting right there. I felt my face getting hot because I was confused and a bit giddy at him liking me. Also, I didn't want it to not be true, because shit, he was RIGHT THERE.



To my surprise, K was quiet at first, he turned to me and fixed a piece of hair from my face and said "So what?"



All my friend's could talk about was the fact that he liked me. And that I liked him too. And yes, it was true. I already started liking him even if I didn't know it yet.



Then N texted me one day. She was upset a little, I could just tell by the way she chose her words. I asked if she was okay. Then she said she liked K and I said "you do?????" and she texted me back later saying "of course I like K."



I was mad at the text I received.I felt that I had already liked K way before N had and I told her out of blind anger that if she liked him, she should just *bleep*ing ask him out already. it was simple.



She asked if I would mind and I lied and asked, "why would i?"



It was dumb of me. In February, on valentines day, she asked him out. And soon K was sitting next to N.



I didn't want to feel jealous of her, so I just let it slide. The change was hardest to adjust to. Sometimes I didn't have time to spend with N or K and our friends thought they were sooooo cute together.



I refused to like K anymore as N was my best friend and I simply could not interfere with their relationship by liking my best friend's boyfriend.



But K was honestly too much of himself around me. He was too nice to me, kind and funny and adorable some nights when N was over at my house and he showed up to say hi. I remember one time he came, we told there staring at each other and giggling as if someone wanted to tell the other "i like you." but nothing ever happened that way.



Junior year came up, and over the summer their relationship was a bit rocky as N told me sometimes. I honestly dreaded hearing about it sometimes because N felt that K wasn't "into" her as she'd thought. With her relationship on her mind 24/7 and her family drama, I never spoke of what was going on with mine at home.



Randomly, K texted me and said he was outside my house. My mother wasn't home and my two brother's and sister were clueless to this boy waiting for me outside. I went outside even though I didn't want to because I hate winter but did anyway because truth be told, I missed K. Even though we weren't together. I missed him and his company.



He smiled when he saw me. It was weak like he wasn't himself. I was being a little more bitter than usual and he picked up on it quickly. He looked at me funny, then asked "Are you mad at me?" I denied to make him feel better and I honestly couldn't bare the look on his face. A couple of moments later, he kissed me. And he kissed me. And he kissed me. Longer than I expected it to be.



He told me, "That's what I came here for." I said, "For?"

And he replied, "For confirmation."



I went home and got yelled at, but I didn't care. My like was starting to feel like love and I didn't mind either.



But I forgot that N and K were still together. But not for long.



They broke up months ago, and everything was kind of okay when it happened. But then I told her that K and I kissed a few months back and she claimed that she should be mad but she isn't because K and her are not together anymore. But she and I both knew she was lying.



K took the opportunity to snag more kisses from me. We gave each other longing looks non stop sometimes. I didn't want to tell N or any of my other friends because of their reactions. I didn't want this secret to end either because I had too much issues going on at home and it made me slightly more depressed than usual.



N and I's friendship began to diminish. She began to talk more frequently with another friend and they seem like such best friends now. It hurts yes, because it still goes on now.



If that didn't hurt me enough, K asked me if he could tell me something that he didn't really want to say, but he had to. I was afraid of his serious face at the time but was oblivious to what it was.



He said the big 3 words of I love you and that he would be okay to be just friends. We hugged for a while and stopped doing all the flirting. I felt like I was still betraying N even though we barely talked.



If we did, its awkward. As if when we first met on an endless loop.



K and I talk still. It's better being friends with him sometimes, but other times, I have to resist the urge to kiss him...

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