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      Mr Ben and Eddie. The one that got away.


I'm Mr Ben and this is my story about the one that got away. Question, love at first sight... Do you believe in it? Do you think such a thing is possible? I mean, on that first gaze?, I didn't until it hit me like a ten ton truck. About five years ago, during the final days of May I met a girl that would make my heart race so fast I thought I might pass out. Until that time I was in an average relationship with a woman I thought I loved. We had a beautiful child and a comfortable life, then I moved jobs and met somebody who would change my life and break my heart like a never thought anybody could do. Eddie was the most beautiful person the eye could ever wish to meet. Big eyes, dark hair and a personality that mesmerised me. We fell in love quickly after our meet and started a love affair that felt so right. I wanted her to be my everything but my responsibilities as a father combined with stupid, stubborn values made me stay in my relationship at home. She was patient, tolerant and loving but I knew she would give up waiting for me after a while. When it came it almost physically and emotionally killed me. A month after our split I became ill and needed an operation, I really needed Eddie but she wasn't there, as I battled with my health the only thing I could think about was her, the times we had spent together and wishing I could do something to put it right again. I dreamt about her at night, thought about her during the day. The dreams and thoughts were always consistent, always Eddie getting in touch saying I want you back, this is crazy we love each other too much for this separation. But nothing came. I would close my eyes at night and say private prayers to god,bargaining with him. Despite not being religious I asked for his help, nothing. Over time the gut wrenching pain began to ease, but the longing never subsided. If I was going out for the evening I crossed fingers and toes that our paths might meet but they never did. I never called her, never visited her. This pain was awful but seeing her with another man would have destroyed me. So I've put her away hoping something magical will bring us together one day. I will always love you E. Mp x


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