To forget and move on
I first saw him when I was in 1st year high school. He was at the same year as I was but belong to different section. During that time I only see him as part of the crowd. We didn't got close that time. I don't even know his name.
Not until when we were in senior year. We became that little close and that's when I had this feeling towards him. He is so kind, handsome and silent. I'm part of the creme of the crop at our class and good at physics and trigonometry, which are actually two of his weaknesses. One day, he asked a favor over the phone(texts) if I could explain velocity to him because it's his turn to report during that day. And I agreed, and he called me and explained it to him over the phone. It's kind of difficult so I told him I'll just explain to you at school and he said yes.
That's the start of me getting close at him. Not that so close I guess.
I was mad at myself because he only approach me when he offer something from me. He's a jerk. I ignore him when we accidentally met at the hallway or at our classroom. It's just so painful. I'm expecting for something but it was nothing.
It's already 4 years passed and he started to have a communication with me. This feeling that I forgot blossomed again when I saw him last month. But what totally shocked me was he's asking a favor if I like to have sex with him. And I said NO! From that same feeling that just blossomed it just fade away. I can also feel the pain. Why did I even considered meeting up with him?
But it's okay giving my self a chance to meet with him is not only feeling this pain but giving myself a reason not to love him anymore.
Up until this day, I'm on my last year in college getting my degree hoping to get my CPA license by next year. And I'm so happy with my life right now.