A love story with no happy ending ever
It was a strange day when she met him her gut was saying why be shy its only coffee and heís a friend from the internet. Little did she know that this day would change her life for ever?
They had a coffee and chatted about the game they both played and general chat, not much time really maybe 30 minutes of their lifes but it was 30 minutes that would change everything for both of them.
As he walked away she already knew there was something different not just that teenager feeling it was as if something had just clicked but it took a few days for her to release this change.
As days went by they continued to chat as normal although the tone had changed they had began to get more familiar with each other, teasing about meeting again and what they might do if they did. All good fun, well that what they thought the truth was she had fallen for him big time every call, every txt and every night on the game she needed to hear ,see his response to her comments.
With both of them being married they were playing with each other and then she decided that she had to find out if what she was feeling was the truth or just a fantasy that she would run away from if they were to really meet.
Their first meeting was arranged she would be at a Hotel and he would visit early mornings before he went to work not ideal but the best they could do considering. Cant say that there first meet was the best but there was no guilt no fear no regret from either of them. On the way home she was clear it was nonsense and she would stop it before it got out of hand for her, about Ĺ hour later she knew what she needed to do but found herself crying on the way home not because of guilt or regret but because at the time she knew she loved him and that she had to let go because he would never love her in the same way.
It didnít work within days of the email she had sent trying to stop their friendship she was crawling back to him finding away round what she had said just so that she could be part of his life even if it was a limit version of it. This happen quite a few times she would feel strong and know the right thing to do and just as it was sent the regret would start and she would be ready to crawl back to him.. He never made any promises, he was always straight about what he felt, a special friendship with benefits a mutual understanding and 99% of the time that was fine she could deal with it, she had her life and not a bad one to be honest with her family. It was that darn 1% that got her sometimes the part that sometimes slipped through, when he showed just by a word or remark where she thought she could see that he cared for her, never as much as she did for him but enough for her to have hope and that is what the killer was the hope that she could have him.
They meet a few times and each time they seem to get better with each other they would lay in bed, she staring at him taking in every single line of his face because she never knew if there would be a next time. They never really spoke during sex, she longed for him to say her name and tell her he loved her. She had to work so hard not to say she loved him during sex, remember this is not love making this is pure sex between two adults.
There meeting again but this time the gods have been kind because they are staying over with each other, part of her see this as a sign, he would never allowed to happen months ago he must care. The truth is it just happen to be right and she could never say no to him. If he asked her to meet in the middle of no where she would do.
When they have had their falling out part she always puts the barrier up telling him she would never leave her family for him, what he does not know and may never know it she would leave her family and live anywhere if it meant being with him.
She will go to this Hotel and try so hard not to show how she is really feeling about him, she puts on this barrier and becomes a sex tart for him, anything and everything goes. Its her way of being close to him making him part of her life.
She knows she will never have his love just his body and the strange thing is thatís fine because that way she does not have to confront the fact he does not love her.
She know if she is lucky he will be part of her life for a very long time but only if she stays as the sex tart and not the person that loves him and want to be with him.