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      When he signed in to my heart

     






In an unexpected event, I joined to my brotherís basketball league as part of the committee. It was November 2010 when the 1st time I saw him because I was one of the photographer in the opening parade, that time I donít even like him, he was like nothing to me. I was just there to take pictures of all the team that joined the parade. As the league goes by Iím starting to recognized the name tandog when they have game, I thought it was his pet name and later on I realized that it was his family name the commentator always say his name because he is one the best player of his team. I was committed to someone that time so my focus is in there, Iím a type of person that focuses only to what I have in present and I know how to value commitment. One time I was assigned to decide for something about the quotas because my brother was not there. After of short talks he had to sign to the record book to let the game started. But I feel something unusual when I smell his scent and finally see him really close to me I thought it was nothing but in every game I noticed that I always wanted to see him and watch him play. I told to one of my close friend that I have a crush from the league and fortunately her bf knows him. Days gone by when me and friends are in the house my friend called me and sayĒ he wants to get your number and I say yes its ok give it to himĒ that time my heart beats so fast Iím excited of what will happen next, as I expected he texted me after 5mins and thatís how it started almost every day we are exchanging text messages. He is very consistent but as I said I was committed that time so Iím controlling myself but maybe things has to be happen. Until we are getting closer and closer and finally talk to each other December of the same year. I will not forget that night because Im happy. Although Iím committed but I miss to be with a guy who has a sense to talk. Iíve been single for two years so i really enjoyed that night. As day goes by weíre getting closer and closer, like our day is not complete without seeing each other the more we become closer our feelings are becoming more strange, all we know that time is we are happy when weíre together. He thought me a lot of things and I realized many good and bad things about him, but I can accept it.I know that anytime soon he will be leaving for abu dhabi because of work, so even I know that Iím falling for him I still tried to control my feelings because what we have was just a months, I donít even know whatís his past. He never fails to surprise me, he is very expressive to his feelings for me if guy do that no girl would ignore that. Until the day came, he has to leave and heíd promise me that he will marry me no matter what happen in the future, he always tells me that he loves me in the short period of time that weíve been together is enough for him to marry me, it was very painful and hard because I used to see him everyday, But his words and promised are enough for me. After 2weeks he got back to the Philippines because something happened in dubai, the result of his medical in unfit to work, so I was really worried to him, and I expected that he will be more needing me because of what happened, but my expectations did not happened. When he arrived he did not even text me, so I was really worried to the point that I was crying because I didnít know what happened. After 1 week of not doing anything by him, I decide to make a move to meet him. Im happy that he agreed, We see each other in our friends house I was really happy, excited and nervous at the same time I thought everything will be fine because we finally meet and I know that he misses me like I misses him, but my expectations did not happened, he was very cold to me and canít even look into my eyes, his actions makes my heart cry but I feel like im really numb, All I want that night is feel him, say the things that I want to say so from our friends house we moved to the place where we always go, the other house of our friend. We shared love and I kissed him so deeply because I want him to feel how I missed him and he did also, after that moment, I talked to him seriously, im about to cry but I have to resist because I want him to see me strong even we both know that weíre both hurting, he answered all my questions but im not satisfied I know he was lying, and then suddenly the tears and emotions bursts out. He decide to go home and I donít stopped him, when my friend finally came I cried to her shoulder and only word I say, is ď ni it really hurtsĒ that time I feel Iíll die, I still tried to get him back to that place and he said he doesnít want, when were starting he never refused me, but the guy that met before has CHANGED a lot, but I have to be strong and understand that he is suffering from frustrations. I should understand because I love him, I texted him that night and asked if he still love me and answered very quick, ďI DONíT LOVE YOU ANYMORE PLEASE LET ME GO ď that words made my whole world wrecked . But still love him so the next morning I texted him again saying that I will forget all the things that you said last night, but he did not replying anymore, Iím still thankful because my mom was there comforting me and saying things will be alright in time, all this happened on the month of February, for almost 1 month we donít have any communication, I thought it was really the end of everything until march that year he texted me saying ďgood nightĒ the number appeared anonymous but I know he was the one. So I replied Iím fine, and thatís how again we started, after 2 days I invited him together with my friend to eat dinner and he came, I was nervous because I donít know what would be my actions but one thing is for sure I donít want him to see me hurting, so we ate and then after they leave and he texted me saying thank you, and I said welcome. We both know that time that we are still in the process of coping, and I know that we are not still ok, so I let the god moved for us, he realized that in his deepest and downers time I didnít leave him, that he was the one who gave up on me and in our relationship, he started to court me again and I thought things are finally alright we celebrated our 2nd month anniversary, I cooked his favorite food, and we shared again our love together, I am really happy and he is so sweet that night I feel he turned back what he is before, so I was really happy, the next morning me and my sister has swimming, and that night when I was in the swimming he texted me saying ď I want this to stoppedĒ my world again melt, I was so confused to his actions, I asked him why you are doing this to me? You always hurting me, I cried a lot and he ruined my night. Things happened weíve been fine again and to the point that we had to let each other but we still end up together, our relationship is like a roller coaster, many ups and downs, But what we know is ď WE ARE AT OUR HAPPIEST WHEN WEíRE TOGETHERĒ and now he is in Taiwan for 7 mos and im in London but what are plans before that in time that god will give us a chance we will be getting married, Iím happy and really blessed to have him in my life for me he is answer to my prayers, We are more matured and stronger that before and im hoping in the future we will be more mature and strong when we are already marriedÖ.One thing I learned to this relationship is patience, it is very important to the couple to have that kind of attitude..I hope people out there gain a little lesson to our storyÖ

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