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      THE DECISION THAT I TOOK

     


IM NOT SAYING THAT I AM A PERFECT GUY LIKE OTHERS...

WELL ITS IM ANOTHER SURVIVOR IN THIS THAT WOULD LIKE TO SUCCEED IN MY LIFE.WELL IN LIFE AS OTHERS IVE GONE THROUGH THE BITTER PART MORE THAN THE SWEET PART LIKE SOME OF THEM.BUT EVERYTHING STARTES TO CHANGE FOR ME WHEN I MEET MY SOULMATE rahini.SHE WAS THE MOST CARING GIRL AND SHE DID SO MANY THINGS FOR ME.IF I STARTED TO LIST OUT EVERY SINGLE THINGS THAT WE DONE I MIGHT ENDS UP AT MY WORKING PLACE TILL TOMORROW MORNING AND IM MIGHT STILL BE TYPING COZ FOR EVERY SINGLE MOMENT THAT WE BEEN TOGETHER I WONT FORGET IT...

I BELIEVE THAT IF YOU LOVE SOMEONE THAT U HAVE TO SACRIFICE A LOT TO MAKE SURE THAT THE PERSON THAT YOU LOVE SHOULDNT GET BLAMED FOR ANYTHING.SO MOST OF THE TIME I DONT SPEND MUCH TIME WT HER BECAUSE I DONT WANT HER TO HAVE ANY BAD REPUTATION AMONG HER FAMILY MEMBERS.WELL WERE INDIAN IN MALAYSIA AND DUDE YOU KNOW PARENTS EVEN THEY BEEN IN LOVE BEFORE BURT FOR THEM LOVE IS SOMETHING THAT NOT GOOD.

TO MAKE IT SHORT EVERYTHING WAS OK TILL 08 WHERE I HAD ALOT DIFFICULTIES ON MY LIFE.I DECIDED TO QUIT MY JOB AND CHANGE MY CAREER DUE TO I FIND WT THE CURRENT LIFE IM NOT ABLE TO PROVIDE A SECURED JOB.AND DUDE YOU KNOW THAT 08 WAS A YEAR WHERE ITS NOT EASY TO FIND A GOOD JOB TOO.

COME TO ONE TERM I DONT EVEN HAVE MONEY TO EAT AND DUE TO I DONT WANT TO HURT HER IM NOT IN TOUCH WITH HER FOR A WHILE.ABT A MONTH.EVERY NIGHT AND MORNING ILL BE JUST PRAYING TO GOD THAT EVERYTHING WILL CHANGE AND BACK TO NORMAL..

AT LAST AFTER 1 MONTH I HAD CONTACTED HER.SHE WS NOT HAPPY AT ALL AND SHE SAID THAT IM NOT APPRECIATING HER.GOD KNOWS HOW HURTING IT IS WHEN SOMEONE THAT U ALWAYS THINK THAT MORE IMPORTANT THAN ANYTING IN UR LIFE TELLS YOU THAT YOU DONT LOVE HER.FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE I HAD CRIED.I TOLD HER THAT ITS NOT AS WHAT SHE THINK AND IF IVE BEEN GIVEN OPPORTUNITY I CAN PROVE TO HER THAT WHAT IM SAYIN WAS TRUE.TO MAKE THE THINGS WORST HER BEST FREN STARTED TO POISON HER AND IF IM NOT MISTAKEN HE DID PROPOSED TO ME.GOD KNOWS HOW HURTIN IT IS WHEN U GOT A CALL FROM ANYMOUS SAYIN THAT YOUR GF IS MINE AND U CANT DO ANYTHIN ABOUT IT.

I DONT KNOW WHAT OTHERS THINK ABOUT LOVE BUT FOR ME I LIVE ONCE AND MY LOVE IS ONLY ONCE.WHEN SHE ASK FOR BREAK OFF I FELT THAT NOTHIN MORE INSIDE THIS BODY AND WHAT AM I DOIN IN THIS WORLD ANYMORE.



WELL I VE DECIDED FOR WHAT EVER MISTAKE THAT I HAD DONE AND IF SHE FELT THAT THE ONLY WAY SHE CAN BE HAPPY IS IF I LEFT HER WELL IM WILLING TO DO THAT..BUT UNDER MY TERM THE ONLY WAY THAT I KNOW THAT CLAIM MY LIFE.WELL ITS LOOK STUPID BUT IM NOT SAYIN THIS BUT IVE DECIDED TO SUICIDE....



IM JUST WAITING TO HEAR THAT SHE IS MARRIED AND HAVIN A HAPPY LIFE BEFORE IM GOIN TO END MINE.I EVEN CAN DO IT RITE NOW ITSELF BUT ITS JUST I DONT WANT HER TO BLAME HERSELF FOR WAT IM GOIN TO DO EVEN INDIRECTLY SHE IS THE REASON Y IM DOIN THIS.WEL SOME MIGHT CALL ME LOSER..BUT THINK BY YOURSELF WHATS THE POINT YOU LOVE SO MANY OF THEM BECAUSE LOVE ONLY ONCE.AS HOW U CAN CHNGE UR PARENTS SAME GOES TO YOUR LOVER OR WIFE....IM NOT SHARING THIS TO SAY I AM GREAT BUT JUST FOR WHOEVER OUT THERE THAT FEELS THAT TOU HAVE THE SAME THOUGHT LIKE ME DONT EVER CHNGE YOUR THOUGHT.IN THIS PAST 1 YEAR IM DOIN WHAT EVER I CAN TO TREASURE ALL OUR MEMORIES TOGETHER COZ I WANT TO LEAVE THIS WORLD WT AS MUCH AS MEMORY I CAN....14 FEB WILL BE MY 6 YRS ANNIVERSARY AND HOPE I CAN HOLD UIP TILL THAT...FOR MY LOVE I DONT KNOW AND DONT CARE WETHER U STILL LOVE ME OR NOT.COZ I DID LOVE YOU UNCONDITIONALLY AND I WILL DO ANYTHING TO MAKE YOU..HOPE JUST THAT U CAN TAKE MY ADVICE THAT PLS DONT TRUST THE WORD BY STRANGERS BUT TRUST URSELF AND TAKE UR TIME,COZ I KN0W THIS DECISION IS NOT URS BUT BASED ON UR FRENS ADVICE.....LOVE YOU FOREVER MAHENDRAN RAHINI....10 FEB 10

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