It was my Junior year at a new school, and being the bubbly person that I am I made friends fast. But there was this one boy who became more like a best friend to me we talked about it all, heart aches, basketball, everything you could possibly imagine, we talked about it.
As you can probably already guess me, being the girl, falls for this person. I mean like totally head over heels for this kid. I looked at him like I have never looked at another person before. He would help me when I had a bad day he would call me in the middle of the night when he couldnt sleep and seriously sing to me for hours until we both fell asleep on the phone. He had a girlfriend at the time but they started having a lot of problems and he continually talked to me about her and asked what i thought and what he should do and we just connected, like BEST FRIENDS usually do.
It was so hard for me to look and talk to him and not with to grab his hand or say whats on my mind. But I cared so much about him that i didnt wanna lose our bond over me being stupid and telling him, I knew deep down he looked at me more like a sister then a girlfried, and for a while it was alright. Unitl gradutaion came around and we stared hanging out more, he was going to away for school and i was wasnt. When that day came and he left on that airplane I felt broken inside my heart was so hurt and its like i lost apart of me. He called me for the first few weeks and told me how he liked it but was so home sick and I wanted to tell him I really did but how could I?! He was hurting and scared and I was the one he ran too, I didnt wanna lose his trust....
As the YEARS went by we stopped talking, after all we knew it would happen; He stopped calling so much and I never returned his texts and our friendship just "fell apart" Every once in a while I would (and still do) think about him and how it would have been if i told him, if i just said how much i cared...
Well one day I wasnt doing much at work and went onto myspace and went to leave a comment and just say hey and see how he was when I FINALLY after almost 4 years decided to tell him in a message!! there was no way I was gonna and tell him how i USE to feel, so I wrote and then called and told him to TEXT me when he read the message, it was the scariest this I have done in my life. And when he texted me that night and told me that he got it and that he was completly shocked and had no idea that i felt like that... I then felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders and I could breathe...I have moved on since then, we still dont talk and I rarely think about him, but that doesnt mean I dont wonder and thats what I never wanted to do was wonder...what if...
Talk about high school sweetheart. He was truly my BESTFRIEND and my one BIG mistake.