Its a mad world??
I was about 5 or 6 when my mum had hooked up with her neices friends dad. they had been going out for a while (it was a long time but I can't remember as I was 2 young) one night my mum had to go somwhere so it was my stepdad who had to look after me. he got me ready for bed and then he read me a story. then he said "if you want you can come and sleep with me tonight" and that's what I would usually do everynight. so after about an hour I got up and walked to his room I stood at the bed and was nervous as my mum was not there that night. he said "come on its okay" and then he said "if you want you can take you pants off" I was very young and didn't know what I was doing so I did as he told me ad climbed into bed. he started feeling me and so on...
I told my mum the next day an she took me into the city to tell the police what happened . even though I was young I still remember the whole thing very clearly.
he also smacked my little brother when he was naughty and he was about 2 or 3.
we continued living our life as if nothing happened.
when I was 8 years old my mum was diagnosed with sckitzophrenia. the night we definitly knew that she was was very scary as she took me and my brother out of the house and we ran in the middle of the night she kept saying "he's on the roof" and we sprinted and knocked on evry1s doors until they could give us a ride to my best friend's mum's house. we got there and I had to sleep in my best friends bed with her. the next day, her mum had to look after me and I had no idea where my mum was. she had gone to the hospital. every week my real dad had to take me and my brother to see her. I was very depressed at this point because my best friend went away without saying goodbye and I had no other friends I was very sad and lonely. I cried myself to sleep every night. I was also chubby. when I was 10 I started to grow boobs and then I got my period as it was very early for me this only made my depression worse. im not sure if this was before but I kept saying "I want to kill myself" to my dad and once I picked up a butchers knife but dad took it off me. he then got me enrolled in councelling. I hated going there the ladys office smelled and she wanted me to draw family trees. when I was 11 I started to get some friends an the depression began to fade. today I am 12 and have a full circle of friends who I am very close to. I have shared with them about my mothers sckitzophrenia and my period. but I will never feel comfortable with what my stepdad did to me. my mums illness is barely there anymore and she doesn't live in the hospital. my stepdad went to jail.
I am very happy today. but I will never forget what happened to me. I am still a bit chubby and sometimes sad because all my friends are athletic and healthy.I try to forget everything but I can't...it will always be stuck with me forever. but at least im happy now.