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      I love him...He loves her

     


Let me share to you my story...



It happens when i was a first year college.I had meet this guy whose very silent. He just sits in some vacant chair and without mingling with anyone. I didn't think anything but approach him and make friends. Later on as i was trying to interrogate him i was shock because he was a nephew my principal way back my high school days. Knowing that, we became close friends and later on we together went home. Sometimes during our classes he usually brought with him my book and notebook because i don't like writing notes so he was the one who wrote it for me. He carries my book also because I'm too lazy bringing a thick book during classes.So it ended up that he is bringing two books during classes. Whenever we went home together we keep on teasing each other and sometimes hit each other with whatever we are holding. I remember there was a time that we as we went home it rain and we keep on arguing about who will get his or her umbrella first...We were both afraid that our umbrellas will get wet so it ended up that the two of us together walk in the rain despite the fact that we both bring umbrellas inside our bags. It was with him when i first try to lend my head on a shoulder of a guy after we go through a typhoon because during that time there was typhoon and all classes are canceled, and because there was a huge traffic ...we walk in the terminal for us to ride a vehicle.It was him who i always walk through the rain. It was him when i first experience a guy holding my hand and it happen when i have a fever and we are the only two people in the bus. It was him who always makes me laugh. It was him who made me go home late at night in spite of my curfew. It was him who let me experience about lot of sweet experiences. There was also a time that during our p.e class my p.e number was just the opposite of his number and then because of our sweetness some of our friends think that we already have a relationship but it was not for we are only friends....



I heard a rumor from my other friends that he has already feelings for me but i just ignore it and  later on while they were busy teasing me to that guy i begun to notice that i was falling in love slowly with him. Honestly he was too far from my dream guy. He doesn't have the looks. Not that intelligent, or anything to be proud of..He was just an ordinary guy but i could not imagine that i am falling in love with him. I begun to feel the symptoms of falling in love. I can't sleep well and keep on thinking about him. Whenever i can't see him in the school its as if there's something lacking in my day. I never think twice and instead told him what i felt and he said he feels the same way too and i was very happy knowing about that. During the beginning of my classes on my second year college, we became distant to each other. I don't know what had happen but i thought everything about us was already settled. Later then i know that he was busy with other girl. He doesn't talk to me or neither glance at me.I began to question myself about that and can't focus much about my studies about what is going on between the two of us. I can still remember fresh from my head December 3,2008 he went home with me because he wants to tell me something...and i am very excited because he might tell me in person that he loves me not only in text but i was disappointed because he just told me he was sorry for not talking to me for lots of months and that he was sorry for all the wrong things he had done to me. After that happening as i already got home, i manage to open the computer and see if i have friends online in yahoo messenger for me to chat but he begun to pop up in the screen of my pc and tell me that he was really sorry for he doesn't think me as someone he loves but only a friend and thats all. I was stunned in front of the computer and i never thought that my tears were involuntarily falling..my heart shatters and i can't imagine the pain i felt. I immediately close the computer and then i went to my room and cry the whole night. I was very much upset about it.





Later on....



Three days before my 18th birthday, he chat with me and greeted me but i was just too numb to to chat with him and then when my 18th birthday came even if he was not inviyed he really came and he was very early. He made something that i can't really forget in my whole life. Even before i always love that the guy i loved hopefully will sing and plays a guitar in front of me...I can't actually believe it that he does it and i am not happy about it because i know...it was not me that he loves.....He also gives me a letter that tells hoe important i am to him and that he really loves another girl but not only that girl..he also learned to love me and my heart again breaks into pieces one more time. ..I don't know whats his motives about writing it but the reality hurts a lot even though how i keep on denying it.





Recently....



We started from stranger and friendship then turns lovers and back to strangers again. Now i have known that the girl he loves so much was her ex girlfriend and that when he was entering first year college his father wants him to break with that girl and focus on his studies but he and the girl had a promise that they will hang on until they graduate and be together again.....

He does loves the girl more than he loves himself. Even if they haven't graduated yet they were back together again.....





Now.......i know what he told me was all lies.

I know the fact that he told me he loves me not because he meant it but because he was too playing safe and was afraid to hurt me but truly he hurts me more than anything, and now because of him....I am already afraid of falling in love again....^_^



-marsh-

eiramesor1515@yahoo.com



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