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      Like this..with no reason


Like this.., and with no reason, like this and with no reason, I don't know how and why, what I know that everything was broken ,with no reason ,everything was looked well. suddenly , everything was changed the love became a hate, the happiness became sadness, the smile became tear, the securitie became fear ,the light became a darkness ,feeling became lies and the life became death like this and with no reason perhaps it is the life ,screaming its ugly truths to me in terror .however it really was never truth ,no. it was lies, this lies hit me like a brick on glass ,it molested me with no reason I Saied that it was lies because truth unlike lies usually have a reason , sorrow, misery, grief, darkness ,tears, sadness, fear, no one know this more than I, everything came with no reason, I was robbed from myself, or myself was robbed from me, I don't know what's the different between this and that but I 'm sure that something is missing, I didn't do anything wrong ,like this and with no reason everything was changed ,everything was robbed from me, was steam in the sky like it was not be one day. with no reason too. Is it wrong that I loved him until foolishness .. Or my wrong that I loved him .. why..why..he love me so much until now and until the end of this life, and with no reason he went to forget me, to leave my heart to leave me to forget everything remember him with me like this and with no reason. Until now he love me ,but he want to forget this love to forget me and forget my days, with no reason and without I did anything wrong , there is nothing true in this life I get depressed from it, all it is ugly lies.. I hated it. I hated to remember him to remember that I can’t forget him and I can’t live far from him ,I can’t smell without him, he is my heart my love and all my life, but he …with no reason. I think that all my problems started when I meet him.. I hoped that I was not born. that I have not came in this life that I borned without my heart to never love him or meet him. my problems started when my soft heart led to my downfall. I swear to you that I never loved any one before him, he is the first and the last I had no idea what is love, and where it came from ,how it came, I didn’t know that love exists in the reality, I thought that it is a spin of imagination, I thought that it exists only in films , novel of love, love stories, in our dreams, or in unreality…you could never understand it ,you could never understand me .it is hard very hard…it’s very hard to explain why everything fall down ,and steam far very far and hid in the sky, hard because there is no reason for it, like this with no matter………………… When you mix being molested , and having your love taken away from you. Perhaps you had never a love in your life , I know that if you take a lollypop away from a baby, it’s going to cry but if it never had a lollypop before. It dosn’t know what is missing. You get me I feel like curling in the fetal position and hiding under the covers. From what? From fear? From my insecurities? From love? Every day tears and tears roll down my face.. I try to keep it to store it in deapest of my heart. To be strong…… after him I have nothing to live for I have no one to live for I have no smile after tears ,I have no life after death, I have only a brain, open eyes and callus heart


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