I don't know if loves me and I don't think he does.
||I never knew what love was and I wanted to know because I thought It would be such a beautiful feeling but now that I know how it feels I wish I had never known what it was or what it felt like... When I was about 8 years old I liked a boy in Mexico that lived next to my aunt and we lived with her during our vacation. The boy I liked was my cousine's best friend and I would always play with them or argue, But when I returned to the united states to where I lived 3 years went by since I had gone to Mexico and one day I was writing in my diary all the boys I ever liked and I remembered his name and all those memories. After 4 years I went to Mexico and I liked him and he would always hide when I was there but I didn't know why he hidd from me and I returned back to where I lived and after 2 years I went back on December and at that time I would hide from him intead of him hiding from me, I Hidd from him because I was afraid of what he would say about the presents I had sent him and because I was also afraid that he might not want to see me. I returned to Mexico for summer vacation, and when I went to the plaza each time I saw him he would be looking at me but once he noticed I was looking at him he looked somewhere else,I tried to ignore him but it was impossible not to look at him when he was so close. I had made more than 10 letters to him letters that I could of never had sent to him. One time my brother made me sent them to him and after that I made my brother ask him if he liked me and He responded, "Maybe more or less." My brother told me that when my cousine had asked him he was quiet and serious and then he answered, "I don't know. When the time was geting close to go back to the U.S. I made my brother ask him again and my brother told him that he wanted to know if he liked me and that we needed to know because we were leaving the next day so he answered, "I guess it's a no because she would always hide from me and maybe if she had been a little braver to talk to me I would have thought different about her." That night I cried and I felt like crap because I had realized that at that time it was all my fult. Now that I'm 15 my feeling had gotten stronger than when I was 8. I've cried more than 10 times for him what I've never thought I would do in my life and specially for a boy, I have never expressed my feelings in letters and now I have more than 28 letters written to him but only 5 of those were sent to him. I have been loving him for 7 years and I'm afraid for this feeling to last for more than 10 years. I don't know how much longer I'm going to suffer for him.|