Pain that comes with life
It's funny how you can have everything going for you one day and the next everything be taken away from you. I loss the only true friend I ever really had this yr. We were friends in middle school and then once high school hit it's like reality hit too. I realized that life isn't a game and that people change like the seasons. As hard as it maybe you find yourself picking up the pieces of your life little by little. I've been in love,I've been hurt to many times to count and I always find myself losing people that i love and she was one of them. Her name was Jocelyn and we were like sisters and I never would of though that it would end the way it did. She got to high school and forgot about us and forgot about what was important an in the end she loss her self in my attempt to save her from the road she was headed down I loss her.
She started hanging with the wrong people and started settling for less than she deserved. I wanted her to have the world but she wanted some nothing ass dudes. She would come to see me at my house and then leave an go see someone else. She would come back at night and I would cook for her because I figured she hadn't eaten all day . So she would sleep,eat,leave and come back at night. That was the way it would go every time she would come to see me.
So as you can see she never spun time with me but would use my house for a place to come to stay at night . I fought to keep our friendship but she left me holding up our friendship alone. I cried , I prayed and I talked to her but she made no effort in changing. I know our friendship was over the day she lied to me. She had never lied to me before and I know I had already loss her but I just wasn't ready to let go of everything we worked hard for the future we planed together and everything we went through together and so many things that we shared.A friendship that I though nothing could come between and I just wasn't ready to face the fact that once again I open my heart and It was hit by a glacier.
Life can be so cold even on the warmest day. I wish she could see the scares that she left , I know that no one can see them but I see them every time I look in mirror. They will always be there , never seen but never forgotten. It hurts cause I never had friends at least not any real friends and I thought I had found the friend that I never had and always wanted. But I guess that's just the pain that comes with life.