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      Until Now...

     


Since first year high school, I had this big crush to my classmate, Jay. He is not that handsome but let's say, he has a very strong appeal. Many of my girl classmates were very vocal with their feelings for him and every time this happens, the following week, I will just hear that that girl is already his girl.



As one of the top students, I was so afraid to tell him or any of my friends the feelings that I kept for the past 4 years, (The heck with the reputation)...



I kept that damn feelings until college...



Eight years had past, I graduated already and had a good job but the feelings that I have for him is still inside the deepest part of my heart. I met Mark and when he courted me, I answered yes but deep inside me, I know that I still love Jay very much....



Another two years passed, my relationship with Mark went smoothly because he's so nice and he loves me so much. Since, we are already stable, we got married and started to build our own family.



One month after our wedding, I met Jay, who's already a successful engineer. We talked for a while and he told me that he felt so sad when he heard the news that I got married, I asked him why. He said, "you know Lyra, I am so in love with you since our high school days and even until now but because you are so good and perfect during those days, I was afraid to tell you how I feel that is the reason why I had so many girlfriends back then just to cover this feelings. I don't want to ruin your life now. I am telling you this to free myself. Just pray for me that I can find the person who can love me and I can love her more than I feel for you".



At that point, I want to cry and to tell him that I feel the same way but I guess, I don't have to. It is too late and I have my life of my own with Mark.



Until now... I love Jay but I learned to love Mark...

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