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      It hurts alot.


ii met a guy. we started to know each other from chat conversation. he is maii schoolmate. ii always chat with him. ii love chatting with him. im just going to online because of him. just to chat with him. as time goes by. i was developed on him. i felt something for him. i fall for him. and then he catched mii. he told mii that he like mii. && i also told him that i like him too. by that time i have maii boyfriend. maii boyfriend knows whats happening between mii && the guy ii newly love. but he just ignore that. after 1 month ii decided to break up with maii boyfriend coz' ii found another that ii love so much than maii boyfriend. && then we continue chatting. we used to go out. we attend mass together. we always text too. everynight we used to text. almost sometimes 24 hours we are texting. on maii bulletins ii always point him out along some of maii answers. last february 14, 2008 was the first time we talk. it was valentines day. in our school we have the message booth && then he have mesage for mii. a sweet message that ii wouldn't believe he must do that. before ii go home we talked. he go in our room. maii friends left us there inside the room. we talked. and then it was vacation we just text always. && if we have time we go to mass together. the first time we attend mass together was march 16, 2008 we attend the afternoon mass. when we are texting we always used to send sweet messages. in text we are really sweet. but in school we just greet each other sometimes. coz' he's so "torpe". ii enjoy texting with him alot. ii just bought load when he's texting mii. ii have so much wrong with maii boyfriend && then i try to renew all of that with this guy im crazy about. ii became so loyal with this guy. many like mii in school but ii ignore them just because of this guy ii love so much. ii gave him all maii love. i never knew love like this before. then he know that ii have a crush from freshmens. namely kenneth. he was jealous. && then ii explained to him that it was just a crush && then i stopped on it. i never like that guy (maii crush) after. && then we have a lil' time for each other. he texted mii just sometimes. ii was so confused. i miss texting with him. ii don't know whats happening on him. && then i finally know that he was also developed on someone else. xh*t. damn!. ii can't accpet it. last last sunday he texted mii && asked mii "panu pag nalaman mong may mahal na akong iba?" oh lord. xh*t!. ii answered "ha?. edi wla. ok lang" but deep inside its not ok. ii was so nervous by his next following messages. ii was so afraid to read his following messages. but he told mii "mahal pa daw niya ako kaso mahal din daw nia ung isa pa" duh' ii don't like that. were 2?. he ask mii if its ok with mii if he will court the other girl he like. i said "eh. kun yun ang gusto mo eh. ok lang." maii pride comes out again to answer a lie. && then ii let maii feeling shown in maii friendster profile. i change maii background that pionts him out. ii post bulletins && ii change maii shoutout that really points him out. && then when ii dropped by his page ii saw the profile of the other girl he like was featured on him. ohmaiigoshh!. ii was so hurt. damn!. && then after that when ii droped by again to his profile ii saw again his featured friends im not out on it but im in the 2nd top lists. thats the most painful. it was really shown that he really doesn't like mii. after. they now have the same profile name. xh*t!. ii was set aside. ohmaiigodd!. it hurts alot. ii can't accpet that someone broke maii heart. && the one who broke maii heart is the one who ii give the fullest of maii love. ii really love him. but then he used to break maii heart. on maii phone his hundreds sweet messages to mii was saved but then when ii knew that he love another girl ii erased all of that. ii was in frustration. ii dunno what to do. ii feel like im dying by that time until now. ii can't move on. coz' ii really love him. im trying. but ii really can't. ii promised that ii will love him forever && ii will not broke that promise. even though im hurt ii'll continue loving him. the last time we've been together was last august 27, 2008 last wednesday. it was he's birthday. he invited mii to go out with him. he waited mii after maii practice of sabayang pagbigkas until 5:40. he waited for mii. && then we eat at mcdo. i came home at 6:20. ii wouldn't forget the memories we have together. the times were together. february 14, 2008. march 16, 2008. june 24, 2008. july 31, 2008. august 27, 2008. was maii memorble dates with him. i regret all of our moments. ii wouldn't believe we will came up to this. im really broken. ii always used to cry alot every night. ii dunno what to do. im so down. ii want him to get back. all ii want is to have him again. :( all ii wish was to have him again. ii wish he'll love mii back again. ii miss him alot. disaster. damn LOVE!?. LIFE!.

ohmaiigoshh!. ano ba?. di ko na kya. it hurts alot na tlgah. super. super. huhu. i can't handle this anymore. aah. an mkita an lhat na un. ohmaiigoshh. an skit skit. ouch tlgahh. how can i cope up wid disz?. di ko na alm ga2win ko. i feel lyk im dying. oh damn. ptgal ng ptgal. lalong mskit. at lalong mlungkot. ohmiigossh!. im not expecting of disz. huhu. wat wil i gonna do?. huhu. im really in frustration. sadness. really broken. it hurts alot. ndi ko kc mtanggap. someone did disz to mii. at ung mnhal ko pa tlgahh ng xobrahh. ouch tlgahh. aah. potek!. damn!. y disz world did disz to mii?. wat did ii done wrong?. did i ever?. crazy!. crazy!. ouch!. i want to give up. im doing everything juz to forget him. but ii cant i cant. still im trying still i cant too. sh*t. huhu. pnu mki2ta ko cla?. an skit nun. huhu. lemme die everyone!. huhu. im tired of crying every night. ii hate all of wats happening to mii. DAMN LOVE && LIFE!.

ii finally know!. it hurts alot!. haii. Life?!' Love?!' damn!. so xh*t!. arghh. im so tired!. really difficult!. dunno what to do anymore!?. :( huhu. can't handle this anymore!. i want to give up!. Love mii back please!. ii need ?uu? wla na akong ibng kelangan. ikw lan. ur da only one hu can complete mii. please!. love mii again. don't let mii go. im so tired of pretending alot!. ohmaigoshh!. why all of this happening to mii?. did ii do something wrong?.

what will ii do?.


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