My suicide soulmate
when i woke up on the 3rd of july 2004 i never thought my whole life would change forever and not for the best. my boyfrined of nearly four years had been found after hanging himself. it was totally out of the blue. i had been with him the night before. we had made plans for the next day. i didnt understand. i was only 16, i felt like my whole life had came crashing down around me. no one could say anything to me that was any comfort. i started to drink alot, i skipped school. it wasnt until nearly 6 months later on our 4th anniversary i got flowers sent to my house from him. weird i know i thought someone was messing about funny joking yet i didnt see the funny side. it wasnt until i saw the letter, the handwriting i noticed it straight away. it was his. i was afraid to open it. what could it say? what it said blew me away,
i know the last few months have been torture for you but i have my reasons for what i did. the reason im tellin you now is because i know you have had time to accept my death. what i done was the cowards way out but i knew i couldnt tell you this in person. a week before i killed myself the doctor told me i had cancer, i only had six months to live or less. you had lost your dad to it only months before. i saw what that done to you i couldnt see you in such pain all over again. only one thing to do was leave you. im sorry i couldnt tell you. i love you with all my heart nothing or no one is ever going to change that but i want you to be happy and move on. you deserve to be happy babes. im always gonna be with you no matter where life takes you xxx
he broke my heart when he killed himself but he did it to stop my heart breaking watching him die and i will always love him for that. four yrs on i still feel him here with me.