It happened one night!
We were from two different worlds ...rather we are from two different worlds. He is middle eastern and I am Afro-Caribbean. Two people who would never have met had it not been for a scholarship program that allowed me to go to Europe.
It was the summer of 2006, Israel and Lebanon were fighting. I was in Prague supposedly there to gain knowledge of the major religions of the world but really taking advantage of the opportunity to see Europe albeit a small part.
For the first two weeks of the program I didn't notice him. I pretty much stuck to the people that I knew. Prague is one of the most beautiful cities in the world...everything about it was rejuvenating the air, the people, the architecture. Within a week I was walking around like one of the locals cursing the tourists for infringing on my idyllic moments with their cameras.
It was during my third week that I first noticed him. I wish I could say that I noticed him on my own but in fact it was my roommate that pointed him out to me. And then somehow, due in large part to several alcohol induced escapades, we started hanging out. We sort of got into this verbal sword play that was exciting, playful, spiteful and sexy. It turned me on to say the least. We were always snapping at each other, pointing out the others' flaws. The fact that I wasn't supermodel stature, a.k.a a short pudgy girl, and he was vain and conceited.
With all our fighting and nagging at each other, I found myself constantly thinking about him and anticipating our next argument. I sensed with a sort of sixth sense that only women have that he felt the same. I would catch him staring at me for no apparent reason and he would show up unannounced in my room. He may not have been as deeply engrossed in feelings as I was but I knew he felt something. Even with all the clues, noticed by not only me but others in the program, I was no blind girl in love. I knew him well enough. When I said earlier that he was vain and superficial, I was not exaggerating. I knew then that despite how he felt he would never allow himself to act on those feelings as I did not fit the image of the woman that he imagined himself to be with. I also knew that I could never be with a man who was not proud to have me in his arms.
But for that one night, that one drunken unbelievable night walking through the streets of Prague. The night before he left Prague a few of us decided to celebrate. We went to supposedly the best night club in all of Praha. There was a never-ending flow of alcohol including the infamous absinthe. Suffice it to say that we were all drunk as hell. I remember dancing having a good time being the self appointed life of the party and yet always keeping him within my line of vision. I knew it was his last night in Prague and I wanted to be around him as much as I could. I didn't want to be obvious about it but looking back I knew I was.
Then she came up to me, 'she' being the gorgeous girl that he later makes out with. "I can't find him" she says. "We were making out and then he stops and runs off and now I can't find him."
It killed me, of course, to hear her say those words. I wanted to jump on her and claw her eyes out. But they couldn't find him and i was worried. so we started looking for him, his roommate and I. Then I found him asked him if he was okay and told him she was looking for him. I took one look at him and I knew he was drunk. So I walked him back to her. And with each step I took I knew I was a fool. You love this man or at the very least hopelessly infatuated, why take him back to her. Because despite all the he longing looks and flirtatious barbs he throws my way he would never be brave enough to h to hold me and kiss. So I took him back to her and I stood there too stupid to move. Wanting to yell at him in some corny romance movie way "WANT ME, HOLD ME, KISS ME." But instead, I just stood there staring at them. She the turns to me and said "would you mind leaving us alone." I looked to him for a second waiting for him to say something but he doesn't and I walk away. I rejoined the others and continued my performance as the life of the party.
She comes to me again. "I don't understand" she says. First he wants me ,he's all over me then he wants nothing to do with me. Do something " she pleads.