It's called karma.
This all happened around three years ago. It was my first year of high school and I was juvenile and stupid. I had fallen with the wrong crowed and followed everything my new best friend did. She started despising this particular guy in our class, so I did too. I would always trip him over and call him horrible names. I could see that he would get so upset and angry, but I just couldn't care less.
When my friend moved away, I had nobody. Until this one new girl came to our school. She was my only friend for a while. She changed me and made me the person I am today. She changed me into the loving, caring person I used to be before I fell with the wrong person. However, she herself, became friends with the guy who hated me. So I pretty much had no choice but to spend time with him. I thought he was the biggest loser and was a total idiot, and it's more than likely that he felt the same. I hated spending time with him, I still had the thought in my head that I was way to good to be his friend. And that thought stayed with me.
As time went by, all that envy I held for him disappeared. I got to know him as a smart, handsome, loving, sensitive, thoughtful young man. We became friends over time. That's when my life changed forever. For better or worse I'm still unsure, but I would never changed what happened for the world. I began to grow feelings for him. You could imagine I was left shattered and heartbroken when I found out that he was seeing someone. Okay, I had other crushes before this guy, and the same thing has happened, but never before had it hurt that much. I felt that my life was missing something, I realized that it was him, and he was taken away. I felt like the ground had collapsed from beneath me. I had never felt to sad, alone and useless in my entire life. I did a few things I wish I didn't do, I regret them so so much.
It wasn't until about 8 months later, that him and his girlfriend broke up. I was happy, but I knew that it could just never happen. He would never like someone like me. Best friends is what we became, and I knew that's all he wanted from me, was a friend. Exactly a week later, was valentines day. He had bought a rose from the school and said he was going to give it to someone, and it wasn't his ex. Both my friend and I were very concerned about who he was giving it too. We nagged him all day about it, but neither of us got an answer.
That night, my touch football game was called off, so I didn't see him. So I text him asking him to tell me who the rose was for. After about a thousand texts trying to trick him into telling me, he gave in and told me it was for my friend. I, once again, was left heartbroken. My friend then rang me that night, so I told her. She was so confused what to do. She had a boyfriend, but she knew it wouldn't work, but she didn't like the guy I did, but it could work. That same day I sent him a letter explaining to him how much I cared for him and exactly how I felt. He text me that evening saying it's not me. His feelings for my friend just wont go away.
But I didn't understand. The words he said to me, the things he calls me. He tells me i'm beautiful, gorgeous, cute, smart, unique, outgoing, funny and tells me that I am the closest thing to perfect, but still only think of me as a friend...
Now three years later, and my feelings have grown so strong. I have fallen in love with the guy who broke my heart and left me devastated. But I suppose it's what I deserve. That is called karma, and it got me back in the most terrible way.