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      Love never felt before, unbelieveable


I was so innocent. 14 years old. i never knew much about guys and relationships.

The first night i got too know him. he had already liked me the first moment he saw me. 3 days after we spent time together with friends. he asked me out.

I was only 14 he was 19. im mormon. he muslim. i had already slept with him 2 weeks after we were dating. (he was not my first). we spent time together. at night he use to sneak out and come see me in his car. i sneaked out too.

we chatted for a long time by the beach. we did it on the beach we watched sunsets together. after 1 month. we decided it was time to meet the familys. i know we were moving so fast. i had no idea how i really felt for him. i just knew he was this incredible guy.

so i was welcomed into his home. i was so shy. and it was very nerve racking for both of us. after a while his family warmed up to me.

he was welcomed into my home. first my parents disagreed when he left. but then we talked and they came around.

at the end of the year he lost his license and had a falling out with his friends. little did i know this would bring us closer together. we spent long nights out late. we even slept on the beach together. he gave me his jacket. we talked about getting married. about what our house will look like. then he said he loved me. i told him i loved him too. we talked about forever. we shared our darkest secrets. our dreams. our past and our future. he taught me about life. i taught him about the english language.

even know it makes me cry to type this.

after 1 year and 3 months i found out i was moving. to another town 6 hours away. it was soo heartbreaking. little did i know this was just the start of heartbreak and pain i was about too feel.

so i moved. we stayed together. and we saw each other every once a month.

i was 15 now and he was 20. then i was to find out 3 months later he was moving as well. to a town that was only 45 minutes away from my town. we were so happy. it made us love each other more. and i knew i could not stop thinking about him. i wanted him next to me all the time.

i am 16 and he is 21. 2 years have past and we are doing so good. i love him so deeply. and he loves me too. then all of a sudden 2 years and 3 months later. he makes a new lot of friends. he does not come to see me that often than he use to. i am not invited to see him as often. but i love him so much and i just want him next to me. then last year june. i find out he cheats on me. i do not find out when he started but i can tell from the way he acting something is up. i do not find out until september. it kills me. i couldn't breathe. i culdn't stay awake for fear of remembering him in my conciuos mind. my heart hurt literally it felt like knives going inside. but i took him back. i could not be without him. it hurt my heart i could not breathe. and yet after all i wanted him so much. all i ever did was want him next to me.

then this new year. i find he cheated on me more than 4 times. with different girls. naturally i died. he still says he loves me. i do not get it? how can he move on after everything so quickly? i am left to cry in pain everytime. to wonder what i did wrong. i gave him everything. now i have a physically hurt heart. i hardly eat. i always sleep alot. and all i do is cry. and my heart wants him. it still loves him.


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