Our story so far
He was one of my crushes... I was sort of with someone by then... A friend of mine was a long time friend of his...
Then this class trip would come along... I wasn't allowed to go... *what a surprise...* So our professor asked another teacher to let me sit in their class... I accepted to attend that class for that day, since I have three of my classmates with me who were also not allowed. I knew that he would be in that class... He was seated in front... and the four of us *me and the other students from our class who weren't allowed to join the trip* were seated at the back... We weren't really in the class, it's as if we were observers of their class or something...
Anyway, during their Physical Ed, we were just there, seated at the bleachers, then what a surprise, his gym partner had to be absent...
So what happened was we were there for one whole hour talking *freakishly looked* like a couple, while my other classmates were there staring into the dust.
He was like "Is there anyone you like in this class?"
and I was like "I don't know, maybe..."
and then he'd ask "Who?" then I'd say "I dunno, it's a secret..."
and then he was like "Oh come on, who is it?"
and then I was like "It's embarrassing..."
then he said "No, tell you what, you tell me who you like and I'd tell you who I like in your class..."
and then my eyes were a bit widened then I said "You like someone in our class? Really? That's weird!"
(We were the top class and I reckoned that no one liked anyone in our class cause we were too busy with studies and all, but not me, I just got lucky getting into that class)
and then he said
"Yeah, she's really different from the rest of your class, I like her very much, she's kind, sweet, beautiful and she doesn't look like she's from your class because she's not all that tense when it comes to studying - she's very relaxed and not that grade-conscious, I don't know, but when we talk, I don't feel awkward because it's like talking to a really smart person, she's just different, even though she's from your class, she has time to hang out with friends, she has friends from other classes as well, I reckon. I also heard that she's with someone but not from this school, I don't know who this guy is, but, I'm still going for her, I also heard that a lot of guys are going for her too, but if I focus enough, I might catch her heart."
I was a bit surprised at what he said, because it's as if he just described me in a much kinder version. So I went silent for about a few minutes.
I could've sworn he was about to say something when the bell rang.
Recess and lunch and the few subjects that followed were so boring and quiet. Science came, the last subject of their class, today was scheduled for a film-viewing in their class. We were staring at each other that whole period, I sort of felt awkward but a part of me wanted to keep looking, just when I was about to look away, the bell rang. End of today, so as we took out our chairs and transferred them back to our classrooms, he helped me with mine, then he asked me if I was headed anywhere, I said that I was going to the canteen, then he accompanied me, still asking about the guy I liked in their class, and I would be on defense, telling him to tell me who he likes in our class first, that was as far as our conversation went, he then said that he had to go to his training, so I let him.
The next week, someone left a bottle of cologne and a keychain on my desk, I swear I looked like I was about to cry cause my friend Belle asked me what's wrong as I was asking each and everyone of my classmates one by one and each after the next I would hear "No, it's not mine"
Then finally, Gabriel *my friend who happened to be his long time friend* said that he had asked him to put the bottle of cologne and keychain on my desk.
So my eyes were sort of getting blurred and then my seatmate Michael asked me what's wrong, so I guess I was crying by then. And then I smiled at him and said "Nothing..."
Then that Saturday, an unknown number showed up on my phone, the message read "Hi, are you mad at me?"
Then I replied "Uh, no, not mad at anyone at the moment, who is this by the way?"
Then the reply was "It's me"
Then I replied "And you are?"
"Oh, I'm not mad at you, why would you say that?"
"It's just that you don't notice me anymore"
"Oh, I'm not mad, I'm just depressed over a lot of things, it's not you, I've been ignoring a lot of people lately"
"Okay, just as long as you're sure that you're not mad at me. Gonna give you something on Monday, good bye.."
Then that Monday, I was sitting in my seat awfully early, waiting for Gabriel to leave something on my desk again.
No one came to my desk that morning, then I decided to go to the chapel, that was where I first saw him, he handed me a mass guide that very day when I was only going to ask for God's guidance that day. I've been eyeing him since that day. Anyway, as I was on my way back to our classroom, he was there standing at their classroom door, I smiled at him, then went on to our classroom *our classrooms were 12 feet away from each other diagonally* Then Gabriel was there waiting for me, he handed me a necklace then whispered "It's from Carlos." Then he went back to his seat. During homeroom, all I could ever think about was if I should wear the necklace or not, I liked him, but my friends didn't. I haven't told them about the thing that happened during their trip. And they were a bit surprised at me when I was silent during lunch and recess.
The next week, nothing much happened... That Saturday came, my family and I decided to go to Manila and we were on the way home when he texted me and we were talking and talking and by 1 am, we were still talking...
By the way, our conversation was a lot of questions and a lot of 'i love you's...
To make the story shorter, I love him so much now that I can't stand it when I can't see him.
We're together now and I'm so afraid of losing him. His parents are thinking of making him leave the country, what would I do without him? I'm so afraid of losing him. Too afraid that I cry myself to sleep.
Carlos, I love you, please don't go, I can't live without you.