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      I guess I asked for it......

     


My life for the past year has been a living hell and I know it all because of my infatuation with someone I was never meant to be with. Looking back, I saw everything to tell me this was doomed but I didn't listen and that has cost me dearly.

 

Not long after I moved into our new home with my wife Jennifer and our 1 year old daugher, I was introduced to our new neighbors Bob and Lori. They were a nice couple a few years older then us and had no kids, but we started having get togethers some nights and and BBQ's on weekends. This were going well for a while and then my infatuation began. I was painting the deck in my back yard, while Jenny napped; the baby had been sick. Bob , who had been drinking ,asked me if I wanted a beer so i went over taking this as welcome break. As Bob was getting the beer, I could see Lori through the window wearing a garter belt and stockings as she vacuumed the rug; she saw me looking at her and winked at me. As I drank the beer, my mind went to me going into their house and making love to Lori as Bob sat on the deck in a drunken stupor. After I went home, I found myself continuously looking at their house to see a glimpsel of Lori and hardly paid attention to Jenny during dinner.

 

A few weeks later Lori's car was in the shop and she asked me for a ride to her job which was on the way to my office. She works as a beauty consutant in a major department store and is required to look nice. As we drove she caught me looking at her legs and she began to tease me about it. I was embarrased and tried to brush it off as just "something I noticed", but that whole day I could barely get any work done because all I found myself doing was thinking about picking Lori up after work.

 

The ride hom was torture and I had to finally tell Lori after I saw her a few weeks ago, all i wanted was her and I can't think of anything else. Had Lori, just laughed and played it off like a high school crush things may be different now. Instead she kissed me and told me to pull into the 1st hotel I came across where we made mad passionate love. I returned home to Jenny and we had an evening like nothing had ever happened. A few nights later Bob and Lori came over for our game night and I again could not stop looking at Lori; when Bob went to get more to drink and Jenny checked on the baby, I made out with Lori in my own house. Soon after I was in a full blown affair using car pooling with Lori as the excuse for being home later.

 

Jenny oblivious to all this and I began to become seriously guilty about my infidelity; I had a beautiful wife at home and there was no reason i couldn't do the "hotel" thing with her. The first opportunity we had I bought her some sexy lingerie and told her to meet me at a differnt hotel of which she met me at. We had a wonderful afternoon and Jenny couldn't believe I arranged this; she wanted this every week. I was falling back in love with my wife and went to break it off with Lori.

 

A couple of days later Lori walked out on Bob after a very heated fight Jenny and I both heard. It was so bad, that another neighbor called the police and Bob was arrested for abusing Lori, while he was drunk. Bob screamed obsenities my way as he was taken out in cuffs. I knew what the fight was about and confessed to Jenny everything between Lori and I. Jenny just sat there and let it all sink in, then asked me why I didn't ask her to dress that way while doing house work. I felt i couldn't bring myself to do that because I didn't want her to feel like a slut. She told me she would have been happy being my slut our whole lives together. An earthquake right then and there may haver been better this past year.

 

We're seperated and are trying so hard to work it out. Trust is the biggest factor which Jenny just can't seem to get around; I can't say I blame her. She and Lori were good friends and now she hates her and refuses to even talk to her; Bob it appears was fighting with Lori about something totally unrelated to our affair. Jenny wants to move away from this area and is not sure if she wants me to move with her. We've been to counselling and the counselor feels we need time apart in order to heal and then start again. Not  seeing Jenny everyday is killing me; I can hardly function at work and don't sleep at night anymore. I asked jenny if she feels anyhting I feel and she said she does and still loves me; she needs time and reassurance I'll never hurt her like that again.

 

Just shoot me

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