A love like this happens in the movies and not in real life right? I mean how could 2 people who hardly know each other fall in love so quickly? It seems as if we have fallen in love over night.
Our story starts in a smokey, dim and alcohol filled night club. I had just recently been divorced and needed to get out and have some fun. So at the encouragement of some friends, decided on hitting up a local hot spot. Seeing as how I was not used to being single the whole night seemed filled with unfamiliarity's. Guys buying scantly dressed girls drinks and the dancing was what I was not used to at all.
I found myself wearing a halter, jeans and high heels. This was all so new to me. Yet I was so excited and yearned for the attention that I knew I would receive with this outfit on.
We walked in to this club so cool and collected. I know I seemed like a veteran at the bar hopping scene. I was so at home and believing that this was the place for me. There were so many handsome looking men there. I was in total paradise. I had led such a sheltered life I repeated to myself. There was one guy I had my eye on since we arrived. He was total eye candy and I was getting a cavity.
I made him my mission for the night. I would kiss him and get his number i thought to myself. So after a few shots and a few beers I mustered up the courage to do something about it.
So just as the club was getting ready to close, I figured now or never. I was standing toward the entrance and as he was leaving, I grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him close to me and gave him the softest and most passionate kiss. He got my number and I was praying he would use it and it would not just line his trash can.
We kept in touch over the next few weeks. I had more excuses not to see him and with that the communication was over. He lived in a town that was a few hours away from me and for some reason I could not build up the courage to visit him even after numerous requests. So the fact that the communication seized was not at all shocking. He moved to another state and that was that.
I began to date and fell head over heels for a man that I know now was no good for me. So after months of learning that he was not the man I needed in my life, I began to move on.
I wondered if the single life was just not for me. So many games so many untrusting people. So many issues.
Around the end of August my bar boy was in my life again. This time he was in the Army and leaving to basic training. So I figured that this would never work. So I truly put no effort into getting attached to him. As we began to talk over the phone more and more I began to develop feelings for him. Although I was terrified of being hurt I felt a sense of peace and safety with him. It was as if he touched my soul, as if he could read my thoughts and secure my emotions with only his voice.
One night I found myself extremely frightened and he was able to comfort me. And at the end of the conversation he had told me he loved me. I was motionless, speechless, excited and yet relieved he said how I had felt for some time.
How could a man and woman fall in love without being physical or not knowing each other as much as we would if here at my side? But yet I had this overwhelming sense that this was meant for me somehow. As if destiny, the lord or some cosmic energy was pulling us together.
I figured Hollywood would write a story about our love life and tragically something would happen to sever this feeling. It had been months since I had seen him in person. We must have sent each other a million pictures through our phones or email but would he be disappointed when he saw me in person? Should I cut my hair, how about dye it? He has always treated me like a lady I thought to myself. He will love me for who I am. And we fell in love emotionally which shows me that respects me. I am supposed to pick him up at the airport next week. I know he will be wearing his uniform. Should I run into his arms and kiss him and never let him go. Or play it cool and hug him and start following him to the car? He has asked me to marry him and I am frightened for him to ask me in front of alot of people. But I do love him and he is such a driving force in my life. He allows me to be a better me. He doesn't make me he assists me. I know one day we will say I do but until then I just want the courage to make it to the airport.