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      How do you get over your first love?

     


     I met my ex 5 yrs ago. I trusted him from the moment we said hello, I felt a connection... We clicked right away. He was my brothers friend. We were on and off for about 4 yrs. I was convinced I was going to marry him, but I think the whole time I was hoping too. He was literally my everything. My first love, my best friend, confidante. He knew everything I was going to say even before I said it. He became the male version of me. It actually became kind of scary. 

    However, as much as I loved him, there were times where I hated him 10 times more. It was very hard for him to open up, talk about what he was feeling or thinking. It was always a guessing game for me. Whenever I felt like we were doing well, he would end the phone call by telling me he will "call me back in a few minutes", but he would go 8-9 months before calling me back. I cried myself to sleep every single night, I hated myself, I blamed myself. I always told myself that if he comes back I would turn away from him. But it never worked out that way. I became scared to tell anyone that we got back together. My friends always told me I could do better, but I didn't want to believe that.

    In the end, my friends and family were right, we didn't end up together... He is actually dating another girl, who I really don't care for. I think about him everyday, I miss him everyday, but the thing that scares me the most is if he were to come back I think i would say yes. I still cry over him every now and then. I've dated other people. But always seem to compare them to him, and it just doesn't work out, probably because i don't want it to work.

 

   I guess my million dollar question is, how do you get over someone who has hurt you so badly? How do you get over your first love?

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