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      Hope against hope

     



I met Heidi just over four years ago. Heidi has moved me like no other human being on the face of this planet.


I met Heidi at a wedding in 1997 and from that point on, I've never been the same. We've never had a sexual relationship, yet we've spent some of the most romantic and intense times together.


Okay, we were introduced. Her first sentence was: "I'm Heidi and you have a beautiful mouth!" I couldn't believe that this Amazonian beauty had said that to ME!!


I can't really relay in words the depth to which this woman moves me. I am a thirty year old young man. I STILL get weepy over her.


She's in the Peace Corp now, and has been for two years. She has since decided to stay on another year... with her boyfriend. I'm so crushed. She's the only woman I want. I've wanted to marry this woman for years and still do. She's thousands of miles away and I guess all of the talks we've had were only meaningful to me. Truth be known I'm heartbroken and super jealous. I haven't seen her for years and I think I'm just going to go crazy. Call me whipped, call me what you will, I don't care! I think I'm just going to fall to pieces when I do see her again. I know she'll never see this. I just wish to GOD above that fate matches us somehow. I don't think there's anyone else out there who can move me in such a dramatic way. I don't deserve to hurt this way, but no matter where I go the pain is acute. She may never know.

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