My unrequited love story part IIIII
After nights and nights suffering, and crying for I couldn't get love from the girl, I decided to tell her that I still love her after more than four years..
Last night I told her by sms (she couldn't speak on the phone):
Me: I still love you
Me: And last year I made relationship with another girl but I couldn't continue more than 2 weeks, even I tried to forget you but still couldn't, so Now i gave up to fate that I'll always love you.
She: I dont know what to say, I guess we have to stop talking to eachother.
Me: What?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I need to sleep now plz oh my god!
She: Yes I was clear with you last time, and since you can't move on its better not to talk to eachother.
I'm completely destroyed, Last night I couldn't sleep, I feel like I am dying, i feel cold and hot at the same time.. I am hardly breathing..
It hurts, really hurts, everytime I remember that I can't marry her, it was my dream that I worked on years, but still couldn't get her..
It hurts, because her ex boyfriend was not better than me in anything, I was the one who always listened to her and helped her.. and this is what I got..
It hurts, because many times she said things she shouldn't have said, but I couldn't bother, because its ok for her if I go away, she doesnt need me, But I do..
And I'll always love her.. Now I'm thinking of visiting a psychological doctor, Damn I'm 18 years!!!
I really hate my life, the only helpful thing will be going out of my country iraq, though I love it!!!!!! but there's no way to do that, no country accepts iraqis now..
I'm also thinking of joining my Country's army, so I can fight terrorists, and probably I'll die at last, at least it will not be a shameful death, and I will get rid of this stupid life..
GOD, why you never make me happy?