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      If Only


I met him when I was in 1st year college. We have the same courses and so we followed the same schedules. We became friends but I unexpectedly fell in love with him. I keep this for almost three months yet he just knew it because perhaps, it showed.

And so, there seemed to be a huge gap between us. Even if we are just one foot apart, I could feel that his world was far beyond.

I couldn't even ask some questions to him. I could feel the coldness in his gaze.

The saddest part of my story was when he told everyone how much he loved his gf, that if they would fall apart, he would join in a seminary. Of course it hurt so bad coz' it seemed that he'd closed his heart and he's not ready to let his feelings for her go. It seemed that his world was absolutely revolving around her.

One October night, I was sad that he's not in the school for our intramurals, only to find out that he's  out with his gf.

When I was on my way home, I SAW THEM together.  As if they're the only people in the world. I have done nothing but just watched them until they're out of sight. Painful, it may be. Yet, it's the reality.

His world revolves around her, as mine revolves around him.If only he could feel the pain I feel. If only he could see my hidden dreams. If only he could read my mind.If only he could feel my love. And, if only he could love me back. If, and only if.


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