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      Why Me?

     


This is a story which I have never told anyone. When i was 13 I got to know this guy through my friend. At first he was so shy and so sweet..everything was so perfect between us, I think back now thinking what a small kid i was and how naive i was..I am 18 now and he is 20..its been 5years since I have been with him..we always fight with each other over the most silliest things, things like where were you, who were you with? etc..we both basically have no trust within each other. But why can't he trust me? I love him more than anything in this world..but he does not realize that. Recently we had a small argument over the most stupidest thing, which I can't even remember what it was about to be honest..he just left without saying a word, now I am sitting here heartbroken..he won't ever return my phone calls or even answer withheld because he will know that it is me calling, its like i never even existed in his life.. How can he just leave without saying anything? He never even said that we were not together anymore but I do not understand why he is doing this...I miss him so much..i am dying inside, I just wish he could call me..just to say he loves me..I know he is probably talking to another girl or getting to know someone new, just because summer is coming up he thinks he can just leave me whenever he wants and chill in summer being single. I hate him so much but yet I love him so much..my friends tell me not to call him as he just ignores me..but I can't stop, I am just crying inside but nobody knows how much I am really hurting. I wish he could come back to me..I can not live without him...I feel as though he has just ripped out my heart n stamped on it...was those 5years just a waste of time for him..my world is just tumbling down..I just keep thinking about that love we had..I am nobody without someone like him..people say let it go, he's horrible he doesn't love you...but how can i forget about him? He's broken my heart into pieces, I cry so much that i can not even breathe at night..he's taking over my life..I wish i wasn't like this but the feeling i have for him no one will understand..I will give up everything for him...why can't he see that? I was the one who gave my heart and soul but it wasn't good enough for him... I just want God to help me, I want someone to heal my broken heart from being in love...how can love hurt this much? all i do is cry every night and day, its true what people say your friends can make you smile but only for a little time...why can't he see that I'm begging him to be with me..i will go on my knees, I will do anything for him..i can't even sleep or eat, i actually can't breathe properly without him..I know it sounds crazy but I just love him too much..i just want to say why? why are us girls much weaker than guys? why do they have a heart made out of stone? why doesn't he love me anymore?..why me???

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