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      I thought it was love


I had recently broke up with a guy so I had been having a hard time. My friends decided it would be fun to hang out with some guy friends of theirs. I agreed because I didn't really have anything else to do. I sat there wondering who was coming and what they looked like all that kind of stuff. I looked out the window and i saw HIM. He was a pretty big, Stocky guy, like the perfect one to me. We sat around my table and all talked and listened to music while we decided what we all wanted to do. I was kind of worried because i wasn't really sure how this guy was and what he was capable of doing. My eyes didn't leave him out of sight for one second. Since i was being like that around him i finally started to notice that i was liking him. I knew some people would think its bad to like some one so soon but i didn't care. He told me his name was kirk and that he was going to be 20 soon.
We left my house and decided to go to kirk's house. We stopped by the grocery store and i couldn't figure out why we were. I figured it out, his girlfriend worked there. I was crushed because I thought something good might happen to me for once. I saw his girlfriend and i knew who she was right away. Not alot of people liked her. She was very big and i thought she was very ugly. I coudlnt figure out why he would want to be with some one like her cuz he could do alot better. Any how we stared walking to his house. i was flirting with him to see wut he would do. He didnt do much at all. we went to his house hung out for a while then went for another walk. we were out for a couple of hours as we were walking back he grabbed my hand and then kept puttin his arms around me. I wasnt sure wut to do so i just let him cuz i liked it. I was honest with him and told him that i was startin to like him but he had a gf so i knew i shoudlnt flirt with him but i told him it was hard for me. He told me it didn't matter that him and her werent gettin along very well lately. We were close to his house and he grabbed my arm and took me the back way to his house while the others took a different way. Then it happend he grabbed me and started kissing me. I was so shocked and so happy. After that his gf came home from work and him and her got into a fight so he decided to go stay at my friends house with me. He told his gf that he was stayin somewhere else though. we got to mandas and then after a while kirk and i started making out and thats when he told me that he was thinking bout leavin his girlfriend soon. we watched a movie then when every one was asleep we had sex. it was bout three weeks of fun memories and two more times of intimate pleasure. then all hell broke out his gf which he still hadnt broke up with at the time found out bout us so just like that he stopped talkin to me except he did tell me he loved me but he just wasnt sure what to do. That was the last time i talked to him in person. I saw him with her alot and it killed me cuz i felt so hated and unloved. id have people talk to him for me and tell him that i still love him cuz i thought i did and i still think i do. I have never cried so much in my life. I couldn't sleep for about a week. id cry at school and my friends felt so bad i was glad that i had them cuz i knew they cared. i got threatened alot by kirks gf and her friends cuz they all hated me but u kno i didn't understand what i did cuz i didn't know loving some one was a crime. i wouldnt have slept with him if he wouldnt of said that he was goin to leave her. Its been about two 1/2 months since all this happend idk if many people think that its bad for what he did but i do cuz i loved him and thought he did too. I still care bout him alot and i always think that there might b a day where he will come back and him and i will be happy but i kno it wont happen. i know im not the best person so i dont want to make myself sound perfect its just i needed to share my story


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