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      Not really heartache as it is love


When I was at least 15 I fell in love with a boy.. a boy soon to have my heart.

It wasn't how it happened actually I started talking to a friend who knew him. now this friend I knew was so adorable and funny kinda but crazzzy lol.

So we started talking (my boyfriend) and me, we talked for along time before anything happen. Then one day after I finished school he said and I quote "I love you and it's not in a none weird way" (my way of telling a friend i love them is saying love you in a friend way) I struggled to find a statement, I said I had to go, I didn't actually have to go I just couldn't find the words to tell him i understood how he felt. I didn't love him at this moment and I didn't think I ever would.

We started dating and being a couple. Some things got in the way for example, he cheated on me. I loved him by now so I didn't care I wanted him back, I loved him and I didn't care what he did, he was mine.

It was soon to be christmas and we were so highly strung on getting gifts. I didn't know at the time but buying for guys is soooo hard lol. I was 15... what can you expect. But needless to say I was in love with this boy so I was going to get him a gift. I ended up buying the perfect gift (so he thought) we exchanged gifts and had so much fun I couldn't believe I had found a boy like this. Soon to be enough i was turning 16 he was at my birthday party stayed the day/evening and then went home. He had fun, I got a good birthday present and then we talked about it the rest of the time.

In around April - May was the whole explosion. I started thinking and listening to what people thought of him and how he was. I convinced myself to do something horrible that would lead to him leaving me. Actually I left him and then he never stayed to wait for me. I couldn't belive it, the love of my life was gone for good. It had been months and month since I last talked to him and finally we spoke. He told me of his new girlfriend and I of my new boyfriend, he was kind jealous and I was really jealous. I made it as though I didn't care cuz I was in a good relationship. I was devastated. I couldn't believe the man of my dreams was with someone else. So I was sad and angry, mostly mad at myself becuase I did it and I knew it.

A year had past I'm now 17 soon to be 18. I'm very much still in love with this boy who is now becoming more of a man then ever.

Not to long ago he asked me out again, I couldn't help but pause and cry for he was returning to me once again. So here we are happily dating, going strong! 11 months of greatness destroyed by one bad move turned into another term of happiness.... this is not a sad story, this is the story of love that found no boundries.

He loves me, I love him, I'd give the world for him and he for me I'm sure.

I do not have any doubt my life is on a path of massive greatness that could only be lost if he were to leave me and that would kill me up inside....

Love is only what we make it, make it wonderful and caring.

~*~ To the Love of My Life~*~ Dan~*~


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