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Our future

17 December, 2008

  I was nervous. Leaning again a counter with a drink in my hand, staring through a half closed curtain, I never felt so anxious. "3 minutes", I heard. I looked at my friend, and she grinned, "Their almost here". My eyes popped, "Oh my gosh.. What have I got myself into". I ran back into the bathroom for the last time to do my last minute 'how does my hair look' routine. After self reassurance and a few turns in the mirror. I ran back into the kitchen just in time to see the car pull up. Deep breath I told myself, I look good. He'll love you. My friends husband walked in first gave his wife a kiss and smiled at me. Oh he's dead, I joked to myself. He just had to tell his friend to come over for dinner to meet me. I don't need help with dating. I could probably find someone better than this loser of a boy anyway...

  Then in he walked. Over 6 foot of man shyly entered the house. With my match maker friend at my side, she introduced us. Without glancing once in my direction, he barely muttered a word and quickly went to grab a drink outback.

I looked at her, "He is pretty handsome, but is he always that shy and quiet?"

"I told you," she said. "He isn't the stereotypical marine you thought he was, he is extremely shy".

"He still could of said Hi, what a hell of a way to meet", I snapped. "Jerk".

 "Just talk to him," she begged, "Me and my husband went through a lot to have you guys meet. Give him a chance."

I crafted a smile at her, "Fine I will for you, but I still don't like him. I'll give him one chance". That moment, I walked out the kitchen and into the arms of my future. Of course I had no idea at that time just what future we would end up making.

  A few weeks later he asked me to be his girl. He was more sweet than I ever thought, so when he did I immediately said yes.

  We were together every moment fate allowed us to be. We were together so much we ran out of ideas to do around town. We would drive for hours up and down streets, entertaining ourselves on hilarious stories we would make up.

  With all that fun we had, there was still one thing we never did. We both never said I love you. I felt it. I just wished he did too. I felt like a fool to be the only one in love, I knew I was going to end up heartbroken, yet again.

  One evening after being at the lake with friends, we we're ready to pack up and go back to town. Me and him were playfully teasing each other in the truck when I leaned over and laid down in his lap. I looked into his eyes, and I swear time stood still. "Do you love me," I quietly asked. "I.. I think I do love you." he whispered. This caught us both out of the blue. That moment, we drove away, still unaware of just what future we were making.

  Since he was a marine, he often had to leave. Sometimes for days, weeks months. It wasn't deployment, that wasn't til 5 months away. It was just miscellaneous projects he had to do for work. The first time he had to leave was for a class he signed up for. He would be gone only a month to the east coast. I knew he had to go, doesn't mean I liked it any bit. This was the first time someone I loved would be gone for this long. It was hard. Yet, I stood by his side, while he was about to go through security in the airport. He gave me a hug, professed his love for me and gave me a kiss. "I am really going to miss you babe", he said. His voice shaky, "but I will be back, I love you."

  Little did we know that was the last time he would see me just as a girlfriend. He left me a soon to be mother. He left as a father. It was weeks after until I noticed I was late. I took 2 tests to be sure. I was definitely pregnant. I sent him a text for him to read since he was in class at that time. I told him the news. "Are you sure", he responded. I sent him a picture with the words Pregnant, very visible. "I'll call you in 5 minutes", he text back. He called like he promised 5 minutes later. I think our conversation went something like, Babe... Uh oh..

  That uh oh, we thought we had turned out to be our baby boy, Noah. We joked about how we came up with that name, it was from our reaction to finding out I was pregnant. "No.. Ah.." Of course, that was all a joke and couldn't be farther from the truth. He is our precious baby who will soon be in our lives in April.

  After we came over the disbelief we were parents, we decided if we should get married. I loved him and my baby, but I did not want the baby to be the reason we tied the knot. I want it to be out of true love. Real love. I wanted our son to be raised in a strong family. We talked it over. I told him how I felt about marriage. Then he told me he was planning on proposing to me even before the news. The baby didn't sway his decision. He loved me before, and after. I knew he meant it, because he proposed months later. "It has to be a surprise", he would tell me. "You know it's coming.. but when?" He loved keeping me in the dark on his secret. He would laugh as I tried to get it out of him. So when he did, late one night, I was in shock. I was not expecting it. Mostly because he told me the ring was not done being made, Ha! He fooled me. I didn't think he was that good at keeping it a secret. But I said yes. It was beautiful experience.

  Finally, the day came when I walked down the aisle. It was a small wedding and I wanted it that way. Standing in the front, it felt like I left my body. It was unreal. He was standing there looking at me, we both were in awe. That moment can never be expressed with words. The preacher finished and we sealed our love with a kiss. As we walked away hand in hand, I couldn't help but think of our future. Of course, I still had no idea what future we would have. But I knew one thing, with my new family at my side, I couldn't wait to find out.

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