I don't remember the first time I met my love. Our families knew each other. I used to live 2 hours away. Until my family decided to move to the city were he was. He was the only person I knew in town so we were really good friends. When I was a freshman in high school we would talk for hours on the phone (until 3 or 4 in the morning) about nothing. He was my best friend. Until one day he wanted to ask me something. I knew what it was. Because I felt the same way.
We began dating and it was the best time I had with anyone. He was always there for me. I could count on him and he gave me the world. When I was a junior in high school he used to come pick me up in the morning after he came home from his 3rd shift job and then pick up after school and take me to work. He was my everything my saviour. I don't think I could have got through high school without him.
We got engaged when I was a senior. We moved in together and got married 2 years later. Yeah we had our fights but it was nothing to leave each other for. It was always me because I'm so controlling at times. I always want my way and when I don't get it I get mad at him. He would always speak with such respect and pride whenever he spoke with his family about me.
And now my heart is broken into pieces because he found comfort with someone else. I don't blame him for wanting what he wanted. This girl that he now loves was his first love, a love that I never knew about. He was in love with her before me. And now he found his way back to her. He says that it so hard because he loves me so much but loves her too. The fact is this person is related to him. And that's why they stayed away from each other in the first place. They knew that it was wrong to be with each other. He didn't think that his feelings for her would come back because he found me. I went away to do an internship when I was in college and this is when he started to talk to her and she told him that she was always to going to love him. He denied his feelings for her, she told him that she almost committed suicide the day we got married. When he was telling me this. All I felt was the love from her and his love for her. I could tell he admired her so much. She also told him that she was saving herself to be with him. During this time he was feeling so many emotions he didn't know which one was true. Feelings for her or for me.
What really hurts me is that I can forgive him. If he wants to try to work it out. But I know in my heart that he wants to be with her more. She was is first love and they found a way to be close again. I don't know if he would be able to break away from her for the second time. I love him so much I don't know I could ever find the strength to love again.