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07 February, 2008
During my college days, I really don't have that much knowledge bout relationships and all. I am so afraid to commit myself into someone if i am really not sure about the person and the feelings. Until my friends keep on pushing me to have one since i am the one in the group that was left.So they really keep on telling me that i need to secure one for myself, or just for an experience. With all the pressures in me, I give a nod. They introduced me to someone from other department that is according to them was a silent type guy. He courted me for 3 months i guess, and after that the relationship only lasted for 3 weeks. I can really say that the guy was extremely good. Kind'a ideal man for me since, he is a silent type guy, smart and i can really feel that he did care a lot for me. I just didn't see the spark between the two of us. He was so hurt, and i was hurt too. But we do remain as friends.
He knows everything bout me. He was there with my ups and downs and he can totally understand my moodswings and all my temper tantrums.We are already 5 years as friends. And still he hopes that maybe there will be a chance for us in the future. He always ask me about that chance and my answer is just the same that we better remain as friends, kind'a showbiz but that is true.
During these period, we're now both employed but with different companies. I have worked for several companies already and he do remain with his first company for about 3 years. Our communication was open even if he went to abroad for a year.
Things got complicated with my life, problems do always come so i need to find a new job for myself and for my family. So I found one. It was so unexpected, that during the short period of time, i got to know a guy who was nice Everything started going home together since we have the same route of puj. We then talk about likes and dislikes,and discover that we both like each other. I know that i love the man but my communication with ex is still there. We still text and he still calls me so often. My ex knows that i have already a boyfriend right now, and then he told me that he will really do everything to have me back. I am really not that good-looking woman to be true. Actually, i just want to be unnoticed. But these all give me so much confusion since my ex is right now working with the same building that i am working. He really resign from his previous employer and gave up his career there just for me . I don't want to mess up with my current boyfriend since everything really works so smooth in our relationship.I can really say that i do love my boyfriend right now. But how can i avoid my ex??? I already try to avoid him but i totally don't know what to do, I still want him to be my friend.
My boyfriend right now, knows about me and my ex and the situation we had since i told him everything. He is really very understanding, he even understand my complicated life and accept me for who i am like my ex. Our relationship is only 2 months from now, i know he is really trying to work it out. love him so much but i don't know as to where i can put my ex in my life?