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Biting off my nose to spite my face

08 July, 2001

I have never wished/wanted a better friend than the friend I have in Helen. She has floaty, black hair, an unbeatable tan all year round, bright blue eyes and an incredible figure. She is one of the smartest, funniest people I have ever met.

You can image my delight when she finally found a really great guy, Shaun. I loved going out with Helen and Shaun together, I always had such a great time - and amazingly I never felt like a spare part! Shaun was always so funny and relaxed, we seemed to get along so well.

A month later Shaun broke up with Helen. Helen was devastated and got with Adam on the rebound. Me and Shaun stayed good friends but one night while we chatted about him and Helen he explained he finished with Helen as he realised how much I was the perfect one for him.

I couldn't believe this and it made me feel great, I had fallen in love with a great guy - he felt the same and for once in my life. I was the perfect one not Helen.

Helen being such a great friend completely understood when we told her and replied that she'd known we would get together sooner or later as it was obvious we had something special.

I finished with Shaun after 6 months last week. I know it's just cause I'm paranoid but I don't understand why he chose me over Helen. The arguments got too much and I felt if we finished he might realise if he truly loves me or not. I can't live without his cheeky smile and all the silly little things that make him, Shaun.

I miss him so much but I can't seem to explain properly to him and he says he can't afford to get hurt like that again. I truly have bitten off my own nose to spite my face, Shaun was the best thing that ever happened to me and I lost him. Let this be a warning to others that trust is so important and people have to let go of their insecurities before they hurt themselves.

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